One of my closest friends of nearly 20 years is British. During the early years of our friendship, she introduced me to afternoon tea, as is the British custom. We spent countless afternoons, sometimes with little ones and sometimes while they napped, around her kitchen table. She'd put the kettle on, pull out the biscuits, and we'd sit and talk. The world slowed down for those precious moments. I didn't realize it but I was learning something that would not only show me how to slow down and be present but also eventually transform how my family approached reading.

When we moved to Germany in 2017, we became exposed to their version of afternoon tea, which is called Kaffee und Kuchen (coffee and cake). Every day during our homeschooling years, around 3 PM, we'd pause whatever we were working on and share a small treat and either a cuppa, a hot cocoa, a coffee (for Mom) or a Kinderpunsch (a warm German version of Glühwein but for kids) or walk to the local Barbarossa (think corner bakery cafe) and have a treat there.

Due to the fact that this was on the heels of independent reading time during our school day, my kids started talking about what they were reading. Our Kaffee und Kuchen time became an accidental book club. Even now that we are back in the States, we still have Kaffee und Kuchen most days, and it is a wonderful way to reconnect, slow down, and reset.

How to use the concept of Afternoon Tea or Kaffee und Kuchen to help promote literacy and connection:

Pick Your Time: Make it consistent. We do between 3-4pm which is the European sweet spot, but if you have kids in school, then maybe as soon as they get home.

Create Atmosphere: Use real mugs (even for toddlers—they can handle it and it makes them feel grown-up) or a tea service. Set the table with intention. When mine were little, they would put out the tablecloth and candles while I got the food and drinks ready. In good weather, try setting an outside patio table for some fresh air.

The Drink Doesn't Matter: Hot chocolate, herbal tea, warm milk with honey, even cold lemonade in summer. The drink is just the excuse to sit down. Pair it with something small like a slice of banana bread, a cookie or two, fruit, or a slice of pound cake. We would opt for less sweet cakes since it was before dinner.

Give it your own special name: It doesn't matter what you call it, just make it a daily routine and talk about it at other times to reinforce its specialness.

Any Age Works: For younger children, actually bringing their books to the table might be helpful, but by the time they are reading some on their own, it can become more of a book club discussion. If they are prone to panic about comprehension, then have them bring the book to the table to help jog their memory or even just show you their favorite pictures inside. Older kids might want to talk through upsetting themes, and tea time might feel like a safe time to do that. Please remember this should not be an inquistion or a reading comprehension test. It should be a calm bonding time of connection between people who share a love of books. 

Don't Overthink It: While I believe that the tradition and pomp and circumstance make it more fun, it doesn't have to start as a production. It's okay to have a glorified snack time with a special name. Just start focusing the conversation on the book they are reading or read together.

So put the kettle on and call your kids to the table. Your tea time tradition is just one cup away.